Unlock Those Doors!

Originally written November 9, 2009

     A number of years ago, I came to the place in my spirituality where I decided to broaden my understanding of other churches and ventured beyond my familiar world of Methodism. On one such venture, I met a friend a few minutes early before an evening service at a nondenominational church. We sat down midway into the auditorium and were chatting about the national flags on display when the Pastor stood, letting the congregants know that it was time to begin. As soon as the pastor reached the podium, he motioned to the usher and said, "Okay, you can lock the doors now." Aaaaaaaaaack! Can you imagine the fear that invited to a traditional, naive I'm just visiting person?

     He was joking, naturally. My friend only stopped laughing when she saw my pale face and my search for the door as I calculated how long it would take me to run for the exit. My exact thought was, "Not before I get out of here, you don't." The pastor himself made eye contact with me (or because Jesus loves me it just seemed that way) and calmed my fears by assuring me that I wasn't part of a captive audience. By the end of the service, I laughed with my friend about the "locked doors," and before we left the state, I visited my new friends several more times.

     Reflection on that moment of stark fear taught me a lesson: I am capable of judging and dismissing anyone if I am afraid and ignorant. All of us are. It isn't something we should do, but we are each capable of it. In a second of fear and misperceived context, I judged the church and the pastor "wrong." My survivor instinct screamed, "Get out! Now! Door's in the back. Move!" Had I known this church better, felt safer and understood more, my reaction would have been a polite chuckle. I probably would have joined in the joke in my own church. Because comfort levels radically affect willingness to participate, I initially misjudged the incident and was fully prepared to bolt. Had I left, I would have missed a blessing.

     Now that I'm grown up, I don't make this mistake. I wish. I am better at not judging now than I was then, or even last year, and hopefully, yesterday. All of us can grow in compassion by analyzing our behavior and the motivation fueling behavior. Far too often, we allow fear of the unknown (what we are ignorant of) to rule out new experiences from which we would have greatly benefited. And beyond experience, we put barriers in front of places, people, and even God. Danger arrives with the persistence to remain behind the barriers. It isn't that we allow ourselves to get locked in, we stubbornly grab the keys and lock ourselves out. Tragic.