An Open List to Musicians and Fans

Open List to Acquaintances Who are Fans:

1. Music affects your brain. Be mindful of that. If you listen to a musician who negatively affects your mood frequently, give yourself a break. 
2. Musicians perform in a style that best suits them personally. Live performances are not going to sound like recorded performances. You are not Simon Cowell, so do not voice disapproval loudly. 
3. Musicians are people just like you and me. Do not expect them to be demi-gods capable of meeting all of your emotional needs. Do not stalk them. You will be publicly humiliated by the subsequent arrest. I will not post your bail.  Hint: The same is true of any public figure.
4. For the love of all that is holy, do not throw your undergarments on stage in a live performance. That's nasty. In the same vein, do not physically grab a musician. You will be seen as a mentally ill deviant and promptly removed from the concert. 
5. In a perfect world, fans are fans of the music and appreciative of the musician. If you are following a musician for any other reason, I will question your motives and so should you. He or she is sexy is not a musical reason--sorry. Note: You are not going to be suddenly invited backstage for a private session, nor will this musician invite you home. Come back to reality!
6. Attend a concert prepared to listen and appreciate, applaud and shout approval. Do not treat a concert like a Bacchanalian festival. If allowed, imbibe responsibly, please. Designate a driver before you leave home. You will not be allowed to bask in the ambiance of the concert venue after the concert ends. 
7. Thank musicians with a letter or a note on their websites. Even better, purchase their music. People who pirate music are thieves. I will not speak to you again if you do this, and I am not above tattling on you. 

Open List to Musicians:

1. If I am listening to your performance, it's because something you produced resonated with my spirit and emotions in much the same way as Chopin has done. My reality allows for this pleasure.  I will be grateful to you for your work, but you are not the center of my world. 
2. Use language in clever ways, and please perfect your diction. Otherwise, I am tempted to write my own rendition of what I think you are singing and post it on YouTube. 
3. Please show up to live performances ready to work. Keep your voice in good shape so that you can perform well. If you don't know how to do this, hire a vocal coach. 
4. If you insist on making a video to help sell the song, use common sense. Use visuals as a means to help relay the song's message. Hint: Stripping down to your boots and mounting a wrecking ball has been debunked as an effective visual.
5. Truly fantastic music performed well stands on its own merit, so don't incorporate shock tactics to get my attention.  I don't give a flying thunder what you look like without your shirt or in clothing so tight you look like you may explode. Layers of makeup and other items that deform your humanity make me afraid of you and for you. Hint: Dressing in cow meat has been done. I don't have words for that.
6. At concerts, I will not be one of the little girls screaming for your attention. I don't want to tear the hair out of your head, and I don't want to take you to bed.  An autograph is nice, but not essential to life.  Sane fans take this stance. 
7. Please keep your websites updated.  If I want to write you (because I will not stalk you), I will write to your business address or on a public forum that invites such communication.